Couple fighting and about relationship problems

Everyone deserves relationships free from domestic abuse.

What are the six parts of a common pattern of domestic abuse?
Six distinct stages make up the cycle of violence: the set-up, the abuse, the abuser’s feelings of “guilt” and his fear of reprisal, his rationalization, his shift to non-abusive and charming behavior, and his fantasies and plans for the next time he will abuse.

What justifies as domestic violence?
Domestic abuse and violence comes from a belief system that tells the abusive person that they have the right to control their partner, and that they are justified in using whatever means necessary to maintain that control.

Demeaning remarks hurt just as much as a slap in the face. Not all abuse is physical. All abuse is painful.

What is domestic violence in simple terms?
Domestic abuse, also called “domestic violence” or “intimate partner violence”, can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner.

What behaviors are considered abuse?
Examples include intimidation, coercion, ridiculing, harassment, treating an adult like a child, isolating an adult from family, friends, or regular activity, use of silence to control behavior, and yelling or swearing which results in mental distress.

Why do people stay in toxic relationships?
A lot of people in abusive relationships stay in them because they love their partner and think that things will change. They might also believe their partner’s behavior is due to tough times or feel as though they can change their partner if they are a better partner themselves.

The reluctance to leave may be because of financial situations. The abused party may think they can’t make it on their own. Perhaps you can receive help.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Plan the Time

This has to be one of the most awkward conversations you will ever have to have. Make sure that you don’t just blurt it out, particularly when you are angry. You have to have a quiet calm time when you are not going to be interrupted.

Who Should be There?

You and your spouse should be there, and you should show a united front to the children. You and the spouse should prepare for the meeting and agree about how you are going to go about telling them.

Be Reassuring

You don’t want to alarm the children. You want to make them feel secure and make sure that they know that both of you are there for in the future, as you have been in the past. In some ways, it can be an improvement. Often, during visitation, you are in a position to have quality time, and perhaps do things that you didn’t find time for before.

Keep It Simple

For the first discussion, try to stick to the basic facts. Let them know who will be living where and tell them as much about the visitation schedule as you can. If you haven’t been able to agree on child custody arrangements, you will have to tell them that a judge will be making those decisions, but regardless of the decision, that you both will be there for them, as you always have been.

If you want to discuss this, call Ty Zdravko. Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area. For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

In a divorce case, the court divides the marital assets of the parties involved and issues a divorce decree. In addition, they may award ongoing payments from one party to the other based on one party’s need and the other party’s ability to pay. This is called alimony or spousal support.

If the court decides to award alimony to either party, it can consider all relevant factors, including the following:  1) standard of living the couple enjoyed during the marriage; 2) How long the marriage lasted; 3) Each party’s age and physical condition; 4) Each party’s financial resources, including the distribution of marital and non-marital assets and debts; 5) Each party’s contribution to the marriage, including caring for children, caring for the home, education, and career-building of the other party; 6) The earning potential, education, job skills, and employability of both parties and the time it would take either to obtain education or training that would allow either party to obtain employment; 7) Each party’s responsibility with respect to children; 8) All sources of income available to either party, and 9) Any other factor necessary to achieve equity and justice between the parties.

The classic example is the case where the wife gave up her career to stay home and raise the family, and at the time of the divorce, she has no skills or experience that would allow her to get a job which would produce the kind of income that she is used to.

An experienced divorce attorney can be of great importance since he understands how the court works, and can present the facts in a manner that is more likely to produce a favorable result for his client.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

You can get a divorce in Florida without an attorney. Should you do that? Probably not. For one thing, divorce is an emotional experience. Your emotions can cloud your judgement, particularly if there is anger or a need for revenge involved. The results of the divorce may be irreversible, and can have serious consequences. Are cost savings that important when discussing the custody of your child?

You can get help from the court when being self represented. Most courts have a self help desk at the clerk’s office.  The  information that is provided by the self help desk is sometimes inaccurate as applied to a particular situation.  You may misinterpret that information. Your case  may get bogged down with motions which you are not prepared to address, while those matters are routine for a practicing attorney.

There are other disadvantages to not having professional help.  If you think about it in terms of using a professional versus the use of someone that is not licensed as an attorney.  Many of us have changed our own oil, but we might be walking if we attempted to rebuild our own engines.  Suffice it to say that an attorney can carefully draft a final order that covers your interests, understands the rules that must be complied both in court and at mediation.  It is far better to be in court with someone who is a fiduciary and is legally bound to look out for your best interests compared with being a self represented individual who is in the dark about the law and the procedures or is getting advice from a clerk who is immune from giving out negligent advice otherwise framed as helping someone fill out paperwork.

If you are a non-professional, you will probably get most of your advice from a non-professional. It goes without saying that this could have unintended consequences.

Why not have a consultation with Ty Zdravco. Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Under Florida law, alimony is granted to a spouse and it can be awarded to bridge the gap, be rehabilitative, i.e., intended to get the person to a position where he or she can take care of expenses without assistance, durational, or permanent.

Who qualifies for spousal support in Florida?

The standard of living established during the marriage. the length of the marriage (seven or fewer years is short-term, severn-17 years is moderate-term, and 17 or more years is long-term) each spouse’s age and physical and emotional health.

What determines if a spouse gets alimony?

If the wife is not earning, the court will consider her age, educational qualification and ability to earn to decide the amount of alimony. If the husband is disabled and is unable to earn and the wife is earning, then the court grants alimony to the husband.

Can a working wife get alimony?

As noted, alimony is generally based largely on what each of the divorcing spouses “reasonably earn.” That means that if a person is deliberately working at a job that pays less than what he or she could earn, the courts will sometimes figure the alimony amount based on a higher figure.

How can I avoid alimony in Florida?

Work Out An Agreement With Your Spouse.
Help Your Spouse Succeed In The Workforce.
Live Frugally.
End Your Failing Marriage ASAP.
Show Your Spouse’s’ Earning Potential for an Alimony Case.
Prove Your Spouses Real Need for Alimony.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

We really hope people can make their relationships work without divorce. But making a relationship work takes work. One area that is really critical is your communications. If your communications are not going well, consider trying some new ideas.

Be intentional about spending time together.
On average, couples spend only 20 minutes a week talking with each other. To change this, turn off the technology and make it a point to spend 20-30 minutes a day catching up with each other.

Use more “I” statements and less “You” statements.
This decreases the chances of your spouse feeling like they need to defend themselves. For example, “I wish you would acknowledge more often how much work I do at home to take care of you and the children.”

Be specific.
When issues arise, be specific. Broad generalizations like, “You do it all the time!” are not helpful.

Avoid mind-reading.
It is very frustrating when someone else acts like they know better than you what you were really thinking.

Express negative feelings constructively.
There will be times when you feel bitterness, resentment, disappointment or disapproval. These feelings need to be communicated in order for change to occur. But how you express these thoughts is critical. It’s one thing to say, “I am really disappointed that you are working late again tonight.” But if you say, “You clearly do not care one whit about me or the kids. If you did, you would not work late every night,” will convey something entirely different.

Listen without being defensive.
For a marriage to succeed, both spouses must be able to hear each other’s complaints without getting defensive. This is much harder than learning how to express negative feelings effectively.

Freely express positive feelings.
Most people are quicker to express negative feelings than positive ones. It is vital to the health of your marriage that you affirm your spouse. Positive feelings such as appreciation, affection, respect, admiration, and approval are like making deposits into your love account. You should have five positive deposits for every one negative. If your compliments exceed your complaints, your spouse will pay attention to your grievances. If your complaints exceed your compliments, your criticism will fall on deaf ears.

Consider doing some reading on the subject, and be open to trying new things.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Let me guess. When you were dating, the other person was extremely charming. They were very affectionate and complementary. They asked you to quit your job and burn your bridges. That’s how they got control of you.

Then they became insulting and demeaning – finding fault with most of what you do. You were probably in shock when this started, because it was so different from what you were used to and what you were expecting. But, you put up with it, because you felt you are kind of locked in.

Then they start to “blow up”, very often over small things. These small things may be over control issues, where you may try to assert your self over something like picking the tv show.

The abusive partner will snap and will either physically hurt you or be so emotionally abusive that you become emotionally crippled. This can be a physical assault or a barrage of threats and insults. At this point, you realize you are in an abusive relationship and you resolve to leave the abusive relationship.

After a “blow up” they might temporarily back off from their bad behavior and promise to be better.  And then the cycle begins again. You probably don’t tell people about the problem because you don’t want them to know what you are putting up with. It’s probably time to come into our office for a consultation.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Did you know there was such a thing as permanent alimony? Florida permanent alimony is periodic payments of financial support paid to an ex-spouse for an indefinite duration. The purpose of Florida’s permanent alimony law is not to divide future income. Further, permanent alimony is typically only awarded upon the divorce of a long-term marriage.

Alimony is a payment made by one spouse to another based on the needs of each party and their ability to pay. Alimony varies a great deal, based on duration, amount, and purpose. The amount of alimony varies a great deal from case to case. That is why you should hire an experienced family law attorney to make your case for you.

Permanent alimony in Florida is appropriate when a party in the marriage cannot meet their needs and necessities of life following a divorce. The needs and necessities of life of that party are determined by the standard of living during the marriage. Therefore, the employment history, income, and expenses of each party will be significant factors in a Florida alimony case.

We said that alimony is awarded in the case of a long term marriage. How long does the court consider a long term marriage? Generally speaking, it is a minimum of 17 years. That is determined from the day of the marriage to day of filing for the dissolution of marriage.

If your spouse has been awarded permanent alimony, and your or the other person’s situation has changed significantly, you may be able to ask the court for a modification of orders.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Getting a divorce can be an extremely difficult time when everything is going well. It can be even more some when one of the parties has difficulty earning a living. In some cases, one of the parties to a marriage has forgone pursuing a career to support his or her spouse or may have left the workforce early to raise a family or manage the marital home.  Certainly, in this case, it may make sense that the primary wage earner be of assistance to the homemaker.

The law that governs the way marriages end recognize this fact and provide for an equitable distribution of the marital assets upon dissolution.  Additionally, Florida Courts are authorized by law to award additional financial support based on one party’s need and the other party’s ability to pay.  This type of arrangement is referred to as “alimony” by Florida law but can also be called “spousal support” or “maintenance.”  There are several types of alimony that may be awarded, including bridge-the-gap, rehabilitative, permanent, durational, or lump-sum alimony.  Which kind of alimony is appropriate to request can sometimes be difficult to decide on your own.

If the court decides to award alimony to either party, it can consider all relevant factors, including the following:  1) standard of living the couple enjoyed during the marriage; 2) How long the marriage lasted; 3) Each party’s age and physical condition; 4) Each party’s financial resources, including the distribution of marital and non-marital assets and debts; 5) Each party’s contribution to the marriage, including caring for children, caring for the home, education, and career building of the other party; 6) The earning potential, education, job skills, and employability of both parties and the time it would take either to obtain education or training that would allow either party to obtain employment; 7) Each party’s responsibility with respect to children; 8) All sources of income available to either party; and 9) Any other factor necessary to achieve equity and justice between the parties.

Because it may be difficult to determine how the court will rule in a particular set of circumstances, you should have a consultation with Ty Zdravko to discuss your situation.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Things change. Circumstances change. If after a certain amount of time has passes since your divorce you find that your situation has changed to the point that modification of orders makes sense, you can apply for a modification of orders.

Often orders which may have been previously entered by the Court will have to be modified over the years to deal with the changing circumstances of the family. If they do, a stipulation (agreement) may be drafted, signed by the parties, and submitted to the Court to effect the modification.

If you disagree with the decision reached after your trial, you can file an “appeal.” An “appeal” is a request to have a higher court change or reverse a judgment of a lower court.

When you appeal, the entire case is reviewed by a higher court. The appeals court will look at the evidence that was presented to the trial court to decide whether some legal error was made. An appeal doesn’t allow you to re-do your trial. You won’t be able to submit new evidence. The appeals judge will only look at what you submitted to the trial judge. Depending on what the appeals court decides, it can set aside, confirm, or modify the trial court’s judgment and could even order a new trial.

Obviously this process can be expensive and extensive. Before you launch into something like this, you should have a discussion with a qualified attorney.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.