Millennials and Prenups

Have you ever wondered how Millennials feel about prenuptial agreements? They like agreementthem. According to the news, they are getting prenuptials more often than previous generations. Do you wonder why that is?

Career Aspirations:

The Millennial generation grew up believing that their dreams could be a reality. This belief has a positive impact on a career vision plan. Many Millennials are choosing non-traditional paths and are inspired to work toward their goals, no matter how difficult or seemingly unattainable they may seem. As Millennials have matured, there has been an increase in “disruptors” – companies that form to challenge the traditional market leaders. The Millennial’s are often building up assets prior to marriage and want to preserve those assets as their separate property upon entering a marital relationship. A valuable benefit of a prenup is that it protects the parties’ assets, including businesses and business interests, and helps to establish how the economic side of the relationship will work moving forward. With the increase in start-up businesses by Millennials, a prenup can afford protection to the business owner and also provide for the non-owner if the couple so chooses.

Marrying Later in Life than Previous Generations:

Chasing career dreams and ambitions can take time, and many Millennials are putting marriage to the side until they’ve achieved certain goals. Couples that marry later in life have often amassed a larger amount of assets (and debts) than if they had married at a younger age. In the same way that prenups can protect the parties’ assets, these contracts can also provide protection from debt. It is smart to become informed about how marriage may impact assets, income and debt. This can be done with an experienced family law attorney. Then an informed decision can be made about whether or not to proceed with a prenup.

Increased Student Loan Debt:

Another reason couples sign a prenup is to provide certainty with respect to debt acquired before the marriage. The prenup can also address debt acquired after the marriage date. (For example, the parties may want to require mutual agreement on debt in excess of a certain amount or how payments towards a pre-existing separate property mortgage will be addressed.) The PEW Research Center found that Millennials are actually the “most educated” generation to date. Millennials, as a whole, have viewed an undergraduate college and graduate school education as necessary, and have taken on much more debt than previous generations in order to get it. When coupled with any other outstanding debt (credit cards, car/home loans, etc.), it makes sense that Millennials would want to enter into a prenup to ensure that the financial responsibilities will be divided fairly in the household. The financial disclosure included in prenup negotiations sets the state for clear expectations about how finances will work during the marriage.

The Financially Savvy Millenial:

Certain myths about prenups are not considered valid by Millenials (and others!) There is no longer a stigma attached to wanting a prenup and the document is positively viewed as bringing certainty and security to the economic side of the relationship. Open and honest conversations about how things will work during the marriage are viewed as a platform for establishing good communication and trust.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Self Employed Divorce

Divorce is bad enough, but if your spouse id self employed, that adds some new challenges. mediationThe main issue is that income and assets might be harder to measure. In any case, if you or your spouse are self-employed and you are seeking a divorce, it is essential that you know what to expect and how to protect yourself.

Divorce as a Self-Employed Party

If you are self-employed, you need to enter into the divorce process prepared to defend your business assets. While the division of property is a tricky subject in any divorce, it can be more challenging when one or both parties are self-employed. It is possible your spouse may try to claim that you earn more than you do, which could potentially jeopardize your fair share of the shared marital property. It could also alter the way in which spousal support and child support are handled, which could significantly impact your financial situation.

To protect your finances and your business, try implementing these divorce tips:
•Gather as much documentation as you can in regards to your business assets and financial situation. The more information you have, the better.
•Hire an accountant. A hired professional can sift through your business accounts to evaluate your worth, which is far more likely to hold up in court than any estimated figures your spouse may present.

Divorcing Your Self-Employed Spouse

Anyone who does not subscribe to a typical work situation as a W-2 employee will typically have an easier time hiding assets in a divorce. If your spouse is self-employed, he or she can potentially hide the actual value of their company to receive more in property division, spousal support, and child support negotiations. To prevent this from happening, you should do what you can to determine your spouse’s real income and financial situation.

If you and your spouse are lucky enough to share an amicable relationship, you are probably less likely to worry about any financial deception, whereas individuals involved in a contentious divorce might be more concerned. In any situation, no matter how much you trust your spouse’s integrity, it is essential that you examine their finances to protect your financial future.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Temporary Orders

If you are just starting divorce proceedings, temporary orders are probably the first piece mediationof reality that you are going to encounter. You have to have a plan to function under while you are figuring things out.

Once your divorce is final, you and your ex-spouse will have a detailed agreement outlining how to handle each aspect of your divorce. Your settlement agreement can include rules regarding child support payments, spousal support payments, child custody, what to do with your shared property, and so on. However, while you’re in the thick of the divorce process, how are you and your spouse supposed to handle these issues?

Temporary family law orders can help you, and your spouse, navigate any unclear areas of your divorce while the legal process continues to progress. Official court orders can take years to go through, which is why temporary orders can be so essential, especially for spouses who share children and need a parenting plan to implement immediately.

If you are going through a divorce and you need a plan to adhere to during the divorce process, make sure you understand how temporary family law orders can work for you.

When Do You Need Temporary Orders in a Divorce?

The legal process in a divorce case can last months or even years. During that time, many couples still need to figure out how to handle shared parenting, splitting properties, and their new financial situation. For example, if one parent typically cares for the children as a primary occupation, the parents may have to figure out a new parenting plan that allows the other parent time with the children after work or on weekends. Also, the non-working parent may need financial assistance or need to find a job and select a childcare facility.

Usually, these kinds of issues need to be handled immediately, and they certainly can’t wait until the divorce is finalized and the court has made official orders. So, in the meantime, temporary orders can provide legally-binding guidelines for spouses to follow.

How Temporary Orders Work

The court grants temporary family law orders when necessary. Usually, these orders last until both parties reach an official settlement. Temporary orders can occur either through scheduled court hearings, as ordered by a judge, or through the mediation process.

These orders can handle the following matters on a temporary basis:
•Establish a child custody arrangement
•Create a visitation plan
•Provide spousal support
•Provide child support
•Grant one spouse the possession of the house, car, or other property

Obtaining Temporary Family Law Orders

If you wish to obtain a temporary family order for your divorce, you must first file a petition, after which you can file a motion for a temporary order with the court. In the motion, you must specify why you need the temporary orders and what you want the order to include. Depending on what you ask for, additional paperwork may apply. For example, if you are asking for a temporary order regarding child custody or visitation, it is important to have a proposed parenting plan beforehand. Also, if you are requesting an order for child support or spousal support, make sure any other additional worksheets and forms are filled out.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Traveling with the Kids

So maybe you hadn’t thought about what it might be like traveling with the kids now that children travelingyou are divorced. It is a little different and there are new things to be concerned about. Taking trips with the family post-divorce should continue to be a fun, memorable experience regardless if it’s a day trip or longer. Moving forward, most families benefit when the parents work out a concrete plan for how vacation time will be spent with the children. This helps to create stability and certainty in making vacation and travel plans and in the children’s lives.

Parenting time during holidays and vacations is usually addressed as part of a comprehensive parenting plan. This plan is the foundation for how the co-parenting will work. It addresses decision-making on behalf of the children as well as logistics. It can also address whether there are any limitations on travel depending on each parent’s concerns. Here are some examples of questions that arise:
•Who is permitted to travel with the child?
•Will a significant other be included?
•Which parent provides the travel gear?
•Will travel include missed school days?
•How will communication with the non-traveling parent take place?

The amount of detail can vary between agreements. Even when parents communicate well, it is a good idea to look at the school calendar and create a default schedule to ensure that expectations about spending time with the children are clear and can be met. Parents and children want to be assured of regular, meaningful contact on a weekly basis as well as during holidays and vacations.

Below are some other important points to consider and discuss when developing a parenting plan:

As mentioned above, agreements often include scheduling of school breaks, holidays and a breakdown of each parent’s vacation time. There are various worksheets and programs available for creating an access schedule. Parents may find it useful to spell out any preferences or “first choice” of dates and/or time frames. Although these preferences may change over time, discussing them can be a good starting point for developing a solid co-parenting plan. Alternating the “first choice” for time with the children during the summer break is one way to share the children’s time off. Some parents prefer to maintain a set week every year or need to accommodate their respective work schedules. These issues can be addressed in the agreement.

Communication process:

Aside from school breaks and holidays, which generally rotate between the parents, it is useful to discuss the communication process for vacation scheduling. This includes not only how the vacation dates get chosen, it also includes how all planning and logistics related to the vacation will be coordinated and communicated by and between the parents. For example, parents may want to stipulate the time frame for notifying each other of the travel itinerary (e.g. if one parent has scheduled vacation time with the children, when does that parent need to notify the other of plans to travel out of state/country?). Additionally, parents may want to require written notification of the travel arrangements through email or text, so that the plans are memorialized.

Once a parent’s vacation is scheduled with the children, co-parenting considerations continue. A basic itinerary is usually exchanged and should include departure dates, method(s) of transportation (including flight numbers or other tracking numbers), hotels/lodging, scheduled excursions/activities and contact information (cell phones, hotel contact numbers, etc.). Most parents find it useful to discuss how and when communication will take place between the children and the non-traveling parent. For example, the parents may coordinate having the children contact the non-traveling parent upon the plane landing, arrival at the hotel, when returning from daytime excursions, etc. Having this discussion will also give the non-traveling parent the opportunity to address any safety concerns (or other concerns) about the trip.

International travel:

International travel can be more complicated than domestic travel to coordinate due to time differences, technology concerns (international calling plans, availability of internet, etc.) and the general idea of the children being in a different country. In addition to providing detailed itineraries, there are other ways to reduce the stress of international travel for the non-traveling parent as outlined below:
Passports: Many agreements specify which parent will hold the children’s passports and, if passports have not yet been obtained, which parent is responsible for securing them. Parents may also find it helpful to create a general schedule for when documents should be exchanged between the parents, i.e. if the non-holder is taking the children on an international trip, the holder should produce the passports to him/her at least two weeks (or some other agreeable time frame) before the scheduled departure.
Safety concerns: With so many possible vacation destinations both near and far, the possibilities seem endless. Parents may want to weigh in on the possible destinations for their children, regardless of which parent will be the traveling parent. A common consideration is to look at the current political climate and United States Department alerts and warnings to determine if a vacation in a particular country would be safe. Another consideration may be the ease of access in and out of that country.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Using a consulting attorney in Mediation

Mediation is the newest trend in family law. There are many benefits to it. And there aremediation also benefits to using a consulting attorney during the process.

Informed Decision-Making: Consultation during the mediation process with an experienced family lawyer can be done in a way that supports the process choice while advocating for the goals and priorities of the client. The consulting attorney provides specific legal advice and answers the client’s questions and/or helps the client form questions during the mediation process. The lawyer’s practical experience and the law can provide valuable reference points and inform the decision-making. That does not necessarily mean that the law has to play a greater role in self-determination – especially when a litigated outcome is often uncertain. The consulting attorney should respect the client’s sense of fairness and respect the choice of a collaborative model. Lack of knowledge about relevant law could create an imbalance or lead to misunderstandings. It could also lead to feelings of regret if applicable law is not put into proper perspective while the decision-making is taking place. While a mediator may provide a general understanding of the law pertaining to each issue as the basis for dialogue and negotiations, the mediator is a neutral and the information provided is impartial. He or she does not represent the interests of either party to the mediation. Rather, the mediator’s role is to facilitate communication between the parties and help them to reach a voluntary resolution to their dispute. (I note that mediators may draw the line differently on the role of the law in the mediation process.)The parties continue to be responsible for the ultimate resolution. A consulting attorney can help move the process forward in a constructive way by helping the client to make informed decisions.

Supported Decision Making: Clients who choose the mediation process want to make their own decisions rather than have a judge or other third party make decisions for them. Some clients feel they need the support of an advocate as they move along in the process. This may be due to several factors, including: the nature of the parties’ relationship, the level of financial savvy, the complexity of the negotiation, the level of comfort with negotiations and the individual’s ability to voice his or her own thoughts during the mediation. The lawyer can support the client during the mediation by helping the client prepare for the negotiations and help with the development and analysis of options in the spirit of a collaborative negotiation. Clients who do not want to litigate are entitled to secure the support that they need to reach what they consider to be a fair and reasonable resolution.

Working Towards a Binding Legal Contract: The ultimate agreement is a binding legal contract outlining the legal rights and responsibilities of each party. Each client must understand all of its provisions and the impact upon the client and his or her family. Even with full participation in the process with a competent mediator the review of the actual written agreement can be overwhelming under the emotional stress of separation and divorce. The consulting attorney reviews the agreement with the client (outside of the presence of the client’s spouse), provides independent legal advice and makes sure that the client understands and agrees with all of the terms of the agreement. This ensures that the agreement correctly reflects the intentions of the client and avoids mistakes or future misunderstandings. While a mediator can certainly review the agreement with the parties, it is done in an impartial role distinct from the role of independent counsel.

Final Thoughts: The role of consulting attorneys should be discussed openly at the beginning of the mediation process. Analysis and advice from an experienced consulting attorney can support the mediation process. The parties have the right to secure the support they need to ensure meaningful negotiations because the parties ultimately have the responsibility for the resolution of their matter. Sensitivity to the clients’ needs and desire for support in determining a resolution of their family matter must be an integral part of the mediation process.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Let’s Not Talk About Blame

Establishing whose fault things are does not help in the negotiations. When the horse isdivorced couple out of the barn, let’s just move forward to putting all these things behind us. Here’s what we try to move towards:

Establish a focus and listen

One of the key components to effective negotiation is to listen to the other party (really listen!) and focus on the problem. How you express yourself and how you react to the other party impacts the productiveness of the dialogue. Stay away from personal attacks as they create stress and do not lead to good results.

Choice of process

Examine the different processes available for resolution of the issues and choose one that feels comfortable for both parties. Research how each process works to determine whether it is the right one for your situation. Examples are mediation, collaborative law and direct or kitchen table negotiation.

Time Management

Establish a realistic time frame for how and when the negotiation will take place. Understand what information is needed to make decisions, how and when it will be produced and who will take responsibility for gathering the information.

Focus on the future not the past

Establish priorities and then, after all of the necessary information is collected and understood, stay flexible and take a careful look at options for resolution.

Be creative

Solutions are usually richer when both parties spend their energy considering options, alternatives and “what-ifs” that work for both parties.

We know where the blame game can lead. There are more effective ways to resolve disputes – especially when it comes to the family.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

How To Ask for a Prenup

You know it’s something that you should do. But it seems like a very difficult thing todivorced couple discuss, and you may be tempted to put it off. Talk about throwing cold water on a romance – seems like that might be a good possibility. But here are some ideas if you are considering taking the plunge.

Have a conversation instead of issuing demands.

“Let’s talk about getting a prenup,” is very different from “we’re getting a prenup.” Like anything else, talking about your future together shouldn’t be one-sided — your intended also gets a say. Try not to react or formulate a response until your partner is finished, so that when you do respond, it gives the impression that you are trying to understand his or her position.

Be upfront about your reasons and fears.

This is a great time for “I” statements. Consider conversational topics for couples exploring the idea of a prenuptial agreement. These include statements such as “It is important I do not feel exploited financially,” “I am worried that I will be financially disadvantaged if this marriage does not last,” and “It is important for me to keep my financial independence.” If you have a concern about your financial future together, now is a great time to surface it.

The reality is that when people feel safe, they will listen to almost anything — especially if they trust your motives. If your partner believes that you are trying to push them into something for your own exclusive benefit, or into a settlement that they don’t feel comfortable with, your partner will quickly tune you out.

Try not to get worked up.

Not everyone will take this conversation in stride. If you can remain calm — and hopefully allow your partner to remain calm, as well — your conversation will be much smoother. The greater the emotional extreme, the less people hear, regardless of the emotion. It is futile to attempt to reason with an angry person.

Really listen, and ask questions.

If things do get heated, try and understand why it’s going down that path by asking questions about your partner’s objections, concerns, or beliefs. Allow a partner to finish speaking and then ask if she or he has anything else to add. If you speak before the other is finished, your words will be automatically filtered out. Fifty-one percent of the human brain is dedicated to visual referencing, so how you appear to listen — with your body language, eye contact, and posture — counts very much.

Consider trying again later.

If your discussion is evolving into a fight, you might want to take a breather and try to talk again later. When the conversation brings up some negative feelings and behavior, it should be terminated with a plan to reschedule.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

How is Child Custody Decided

What are some ways in which child custody and visitation decided?

Child custody can be agreed by the parents, on their own.

Child custody matters can be settled with third party involvement.

child and father

Child custody matters can be decided during mediation.

Child custody differences can be resolved after a custody evaluation.

Child custody matters can go to trial where the outcome is determined by a judge.

Child custody outcomes can either be sole custody to the mother, sole custody to the father or joint custody. Extenuating circumstances can result in a custody outcome not listed here, which would fall under the child custody category of “Other.”

If you have questions about child custody, call or visit Ty Zdravko. Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Coping with Divorce

Going through a divorce can be one of the most stressful of times. You do get through it – divorced coupleand there are some things that you can do to help cope with the stress.

Know Your Environment

Make sure you are surrounding yourself with positivity and support. That includes everything from your physical living space to the company you keep. If you are surrounded by negative reminders of your past, then it might be best to remove those reminders in order to move forward. Sometimes even just rearranging the furniture in the home you once shared can bring a bit of new life into it, helping it feel more like your own.

Invest in Yourself

Take up a new hobby or pick up an old interest you let fall to the wayside. Invest your time and energy in something that makes you happy and gives you focus. It doesn’t need to be productive and it should not serve the interests of anyone but yourself.

Exercise

The endorphins your body produces while exercising can go a long way to brighten your mood. Not only can exercising give you more energy and lift your spirits, it can also be a safe way to channel any anger or aggression you may be feeling. Sign up for a cycling class, join a kickboxing gym, or even a yoga studio. Or, just go for an evening walk to clear your head, get your body moving and make time for yourself. This can also be a way to connect with and receive support from friends and family if you do it together.

Take Responsibility

It takes two to tango, as the saying goes, and in most divorces, the responsibility rests with both parties. This is not always the case, but either way, it is healthy to take an honest look at your marriage and the issues that led to your divorce. It can be easy to get wrapped up in your anger and to blame your spouse for the end of the relationship, but shouldering some of the responsibility can be healthy.

Acknowledge what went wrong and be honest with yourself about what you may have done to contribute to it. Now, that isn’t to say you should blame yourself. Rather, be sensitive to what the divorce looks like from the other end, and it could give you some perspective and make the rest of the divorce process a bit easier to bear.

Talk About It

Do not let your feelings stay bottled up. It is okay to feel what you are feeling. For many people, dealing with a divorce can be very similar to the grieving process. The life you had planned with your spouse is ending, and even if it is for the best, it is okay to feel sad about it.

What is important is that you talk about what you are going through, be it good, bad, or ugly. Express your concerns, fears, anger, or whatever else you are feeling. Turn to your best friends, your closest family members, or even consider a professional. Sometimes going to a therapist can be a great way to unload your feelings and get perspective without succumbing to pressure from friends or loved ones.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.

Christmas After Divorce

Divorce changes everything. If this is your first Christmas since your divorce, it’s going to child at christmasbe different. Here are some things you can do.

1. Plan Ahead

Make a detailed holiday plan with your ex as far in advance as possible. Plot everything out on a calendar, including transfer times and who will be providing transportation. This will reduce any last minute negotiation, bickering, or disagreements, so that transfer can go smoothly. Kids pick up on a lot of tension at transfers and will enjoy their holidays much more if things are as calm as possible. It will also make your life much easier to know what the schedule is to the minute.

2. Go Shopping

When you got divorced you thought your days of shopping for your ex were over, but your child would probably like to be able to give the other parent a gift. If you can facilitate this, by helping your child shop for an inexpensive gift, or by helping your child make a card or gift, you’ll add to your child’s holiday experience.

3. Pick up the Phone

If your child is with you for a holiday, have him call the other parent. This helps your child stay connected and is also, frankly, just the right thing to do. Even if your court order does not require phone contact on holidays, this can help your child feel more comfortable.

4. Go with a Gag Order

Agree with your ex that you will not discuss anything other than the business at hand when you’re exchanging your child over the holidays. If there are things to be discussed about child support, alimony, future schedule changes, or issues you have with each other’s behavior, table them for a time when your child is not around. A holiday celebration that is preceded by parents arguing is not very joyous.

5. Over-schedule Yourself

If you won’t have your child with you for a holiday, it will likely be hard for you. It’s ok to feel sad, but you can stay busy enough to distract yourself. Go to parties and events so you will have something to do. Don’t give yourself time to let sadness overcome you. Focus on how you will celebrate the next time you are together with your child.

6. Schedule Meals

A kid who is overfed is often cranky. And the same goes for a hungry child. The holidays are a time of great celebration, but it’s also a time of year when people eat the weirdest things at the craziest hours… Dinner at noon, sandwiches at 11 pm, Chinese food at midnight? Whatever your family’s plans are, try to coordinate with your ex when your child will be eating next so that you don’t send a stuffed child to the other grandma’s Thanksgiving table or hand over a hungry kid at 6 pm who won’t be fed again until 8 pm.

7. The Greatest Gift of All

With young kids, the greatest gift of all is a nap. It’s a gift you give yourself, your child, your ex, and all the family who will be around your child. It’s very, very hard to stay on schedule at this time of year, but try your best to get a nap in at naptime for your child. It might mean going a little late to a family party or leaving a little early, but it will be well worth it. Keep naptime in mind when you are scheduling holiday transfer times and schedule well around it whenever possible. With older kids, downtime is important. Think how tired you are after going to your own family’s events; then imagine you are your child who is going to yours and going to your ex’s as well.

8. Lower Your Expectations

It is too easy to build up the importance of a holiday, so that anything short of a magical winter wonderland event will fall short. If you spend weeks fixating on how perfect you can make it, the big day will not measure up. It’s fun to look forward to the holidays. But don’t let it take over your life, or your child’s.

9. More Is Not More

More gifts, more candy, more decorations, more celebrations will not heal your heart or your child’s. A gift may distract your child for a while, but it can’t change the situation. Resist the temptation to shower your child with gifts to try to make up for the divorce. If possible, talk with your ex about gift-giving so that it does not become a competition between the two of you.

10. Embrace Tradition

It’s common for kids to want things to be exactly the same as they remember them, but in your family nothing can ever be exactly the same. Instead, you can take old traditions and fit them into your life in a new way. Keep things that are familiar and beloved, but build on them in new ways so that you can gradually create new traditions for your new family.

Ty Zdravko practices law as a divorce attorney, and family law attorney in Palm Harbor, Clearwater and the surrounding area.

For more information, visit our website at www.divorceboardcertified.com
or call (727) 787-5919.